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It’s important to recognize that there are many benefits of a relationship. Long-term romantic relationships, more specifically, have been proven to have many positive health benefits.
Sometimes we get confused because long-term relationships don’t feel the same as when you were falling in love. The “love heroine” has worn off. It’s important to know its normal for feelings to change over a period of time.
The couple below, for instance, has had their share of ups and downs. But look at them. They put in the work, faced the reality and the payoff has been well worth it. I know this for certain. They’re my parents. Married 60 years and happy until the day he died at 89 years old.
Here are 15 benefits of being in a healthy long-term committed relationship.
Social Support
Hopefully you’re intimate partner isn’t your only social outlet. Even if they are, it’s nice to know that when you want to go to the Bahamas or just to the movies you have someone who would gladly go with you.
It’s hard for many people to venture out alone even for something small. I work with a lady I have been trying to get to take a bike ride by herself for over 15 years (and she knows who she is). She’ll gladly do it with someone else. Being in a relationship ensures you’ll get the social interaction most of us need.
Social isolation can cause depression and be harmful to your health. Having a partner to explore the world with helps you decrease social anxiety.
Emotional Support
You’ll always have someone safe to share your innermost thoughts and feelings. This is called intimacy. Someone is there to support you during the hard times when you are emotionally hurting. The connected intimate relationship provides you with the safety and attachment you need to get through life’s hard times.
Prior trauma may have made you vulnerable to emotional pain. Over the period of time you’re in the healthy romantic relationship, you build the trust that allows you to be truly intimate and feel emotionally supported. We all fall down. We lose a job. Fail a test. Your partner will be there to build you back up when you’ve fallen down. They’ll be your best coach and cheerleader.
Personal Growth
We all start relationships with a bit of self doubt. In loving relationships you are supported and loved regardless of quirks or flaws. You will begin to see a better and more mature version of yourself than what you may had seen prior to the relationship. You feel accepted for who you are which decreases self doubt and increases confidence.
Having this confidence allows you to grow as a person. You may do things like go back to school which you would never have done before your relationship began.
Physical Health Benefits
Being in a happy relationship over a long period has proven health benefits.
- People in long-term relationships typically have a longer life than single people
- Overall, couples report as being happier individuals than single people
- There is a decrease risk of heart attack in men
- There is a lower risk of stroke in men
Healthy Behaviors
There are higher chances of you taking care off yourself if you have an engaged partner. For instance, a wife who knows her husband is borderline diabetic may cook healthier for him and / or may coach him make good food choices. Maybe the two of you join a gym together. Maybe one of you reminds the other to go to the gym.
Having someone observe our healthy behaviors (or not) increases the chances we’ll take better care of ourselves.
Better Decision Making
We tend to make better decisions when we know someone else is watching or supporting us. In a good relationship the partners will consult one another about decisions they may make regarding finances, personal boundaries, family matters, and more. Both have life experience that can be shared to help one another make healthy decisions.
When you aren’t connected to someone and you have a lack of social relationships there is an increased chance of risk taking behavior. Perhaps the social isolation will lead to a drinking problem. Maybe random sex partners will lead to compromised sexual health. Forgetting important things like going to the doctors regularly can create mortality risk.
Taking Care of One Another
I see this time and time again. The aging process causes medical problems. Even the young get sick sometimes. That means trips to the doctor or even the intensive care unit.
It’s the spouse or partner who manages all aspects of their significant other’s care. I saw this so clearly when my father (Vern) declined with dementia and my Mom (Ann) had to take over his care. She took care of him and his overall life until the day he died. I cannot verbalize how appreciative my sister and I are. I believe he knew how lucky he was to have her.
We all need help at some point. The strong relationships consists of two people who will always take care of one another physically, emotionally and spiritually.
Memories
No one will share as many memories with you as your true love. There will be a clear link to all that has happened with both of you over the years. Having memories to share helps keep the love between you alive. Reminiscing keeps you connected.
Over the years you’ll build a repertoire of your own. It’ll be filled with inside jokes, reminders of funny moments and the ability to read one another’s minds (at times). You’ll have great giggles together!
Sense of Security
“If I go down he goes down with me”. Long successful relationships will provide each partner with a sense of security. Time and time again your significant other has proven they’ll be there for you in your time of need. Having back up and partnership helps build a sense of security in the chaos of the life.
Sense of Adventure
Long-term couples are usually willing to try something new together. As we age our bodies slow down, we may not have as much energy and we may become more fragile. Having a partner willing to try new things has a positive effect on what we have to look forward to. Trying new things provides our brains with the novelty it loves. We can learn more about ourselves by expanding our lives with new adventures.
Shared Future
I tell everyone that limbo is the worst in any situation. One of the many benefits of a relationship is planning for the future. There is comfort in knowing that you are both headed through life together. You can plan how you’ll retire, where you’ll travel to, what kind of living situation you want for the grandkid’s visits and more. The shared direction creates stability and comfort.
Decreased Stress
One more of the benefits of healthy relationships is the decreased stress. Life is stressful regardless of your relationship status. Going through life with a significant other provides a sense of companionship. You’re not alone working through the rough challenges you encounter. It’s been found that people in solid relationships have higher levels of stress reducing hormones.
Predictability
When you’re just starting a relationship you have no way of knowing how your spouse will respond to anything. After being with your partner for many years you can basically predict how a situation will be handled and / or resolved.
When the two of you have an argument you can rest assured she calms down and apologizes. When he loudly says he’s going to go ‘have a firm talk’ with the neighbor, you know that when he gets there he will actually be calm and kind. Unlike the beginning of the relationship, you can actually predict what to expect in any situation.
Conflict Resolution
Arguments don’t just happen in bad relationships. It is normal to disagree and have fights with your partner. After a few years, however, you will have learned how to get through and resolve fights.
Every couple is different and every argument is different. Couples do have patterns of behavior especially when it comes to conflict. When the relationship is established over a period of time, the pattern of conflict resolution is established. The couple has proven assurance that each conflict will be resolved. There is less fear of a fight when you know there is no long-term threat and it will absolutely be resolved.
No Topic is Off Limits
Your intimate other may be the only person on the planet who knows you inside and out. Because the longevity of the relationship there is security which allows each partner to discuss any topic safely. Having an outlet to talk to helps reduce stress. Knowing you can open up to someone regarding anything provides a sense of comfort and security.
Relationships can be hard. Sometimes you wonder why you’re staying in one. Sometimes there are circumstances, such as violence, in which maybe you shouldn’t stay. If you’re thinking maybe there’s reason for you to leave you’re relationship, read my e-book Should I Stay or Should I Go. Also, it’s important to make sure you know the signs your long term relationship is over.
While there is no such thing as a perfect relationship, a long-term relationship can have a positive effect on you individually. The benefits of a relationship are endless and can save your life. All relationships have ups and downs. Keep up the good work and you can reap the benefits of the long term relationship!
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